Why ?

I would like to ask people the question - Why ?
Why did you leave and never call back again ?
Why don't you pick up the phone ?
Why don't you ever remember me enough to just call ?
Why don't you feel like just hanging out ?
Why do you promise to meet and then forget ?
Why can't you find time out of your busy schedule ?

Why ?

Meeting Old Friends

It is always great to meet old friends. Met one such this morning. It was a fine moment.

You Know Something Is Wrong When ...

... you actually feel like shutting off the music you are listening to and prefer silence instead.

Kaahee Vattel Te Stats

http://www.atptennis.com/1/en/newsandscores/news/news2.asp

Take a look at this.
1. Marcos Baghdatis becomes the first Cypriot to win an ATP title. OKAY.
2. Baghdatis added 34 INDESIT ATP Race points to his season's total to edge past American James Blake at No. 8 in the Race. OKAY
3. Baghdatis, who this year reached the Australian Open final and the Wimbledon semifinals, had not won an ATP event before today. OKAY
4. He finished last year at No. 73 in the INDESIT ATP Race with a modest 11-12 match record on the year. But Baghdatis boasts a 36-17 record in 2006. OKAY

But now take a look at this:
Of the 133 players who have ranked in the Top 10 (since 1973), Baghdatis is one of only three players to break into the Top 10 before winning his first career ATP title. The others are Cedric Pioline, ranked in Top 10 in Oct. 1993 before winning his first title in Mar. 1996; and Mikael Pernfors, who broke the Top 10 in Sept. 1986 before winning his first title in Sept. 1988.

I mean COME ON ! The stuff these stats junkies will come up with !!!

Pal - An Instant

Instants in time are so important in determining the course of the future. Instants can define ages to follow or several years of time might often boil down to one instant.

How often is it that you realise that only if at that instant you had done something differently how different things could have been for the next few weeks, months, years ? How often do you feel that all those years of hard work will bear fruit or be wasted depending upon what happens in the next upcoming instant ?

Unfortunately once instants are past it is very difficult to alter the outcome it has set into motion. It is very difficult to undo. The only way out is to wait for the next instant and hope it happens right then.

Absolutely NOTHING Justifies Violation Of Freedom

Here, Amit Varma gives his opinions on the incident in which a Mumbai blogger was "assaulted, abused and kicked out" of a cinema hall in Mumbai because he did not stand during the playing of the national anthem.

I must say like most times I agree. Whether or not to stand up while the national anthem is played is a matter of personal choice and while I would ALWAYS stand I have NO right to FORCE others to do the same. Convince, yes, force, NO.

If someone refuses to stand it is up to you to form your opinions of that person. Personally that would concern me just a bit, even offend me, but since that in no way violates any of my freedoms I have no right to use force whatsoever.

In this regard the comparison he makes to the Indian lawyer being evicted out of a first class compartment in South Africa is extremely pertinent.

Miss

So Monday I missed the 8.45 bus and missed class. And I didn't really regret it. But today I woke up a good 2 hours earlier and still missed the 8.45 bus because I lazed around and didn't regret it either. And then now I missed the 9.15 bus and I don't regret that either.Really what has led to this apathy ?

AGASSI AGASSI AGASSI

There is no topic creating more buzz in the news at the moment than that man Andre Agassi. At age 37 he has beaten a guy 16 years his junior who was probably born by the time Agassi played his first US Open - 21 years ago. And how !

The Official US Open website described the match as an instant classic, John McEnroe hailed it as one of the greatest matches ever and virtually everyone agreed it was worthy of a Grand Slam final.

For believe you me, Baghdatis was a worthy opponent. The quality of tennis throughout this fascinating game full of twists and turns was quite supreme.

Agassi just never fails to deliver. I would have said he never ceases to surprise but really it is not a surprise anymore. Yes, Baghdatis was the #8 player in the World, the finalist in Melbourne and semi-finalist at Wimbledon this year. But put him in front of a New York crowd at night and Agassi discovers an extra wing to his game - that quite simply miraculously lifts him several planes higher. How else can you explain this amazing display of tennis after what has been a perfectly mediocre year for him hampered by injuries ?

How else can you explain his dramatic run to the finals last year after again an average season and at one point giving King Federer something to think hard about in the finals ??

Fingers crossed and I would not like to look too far ahead .... but I can't resist myself counting the number of games .... Benjamin Becker next round, then possibly Roddick, Hewitt, Nadal and the Swiss King again in the finals ??

Well what's the harm in dreaming ?? Then again, is it really an impossible dream ??

GO ANDRE !!!!

Hurt

Sometimes you actually look forward to help people. And then they kind of reject that help telling you that in effect you are not needed. Somtimes that can hurt. Even though you have not actually gone out of your way to help that person. Or you might not even be looking forward to doing that particular task. Hell, you might not even care for that person so much. But when you are effectively told you are not wanted it can and does hurt.

Dirty Secrets

Why are people secretive ? Really, I hate secrets and secretive people, sometimes. Especially when they are friends.

Where Everyone Wins

So Hitler’s Cross has decided to change its name and theme. Apparently and I am willing to believe this, the owners had purely publicity in mind when selecting these in the first place and not any particular lover or admiration for the man. Well, they got what they wanted.

The ones who were disgusted with this got what they wanted to – in effect, a name change. I am happy that it did not have to go to the stage of violence and coercion. Well, public pressure worked.

SHOCKED ...

- that we should be so shocked about this story. After all what is the reason to expect anything else ?

Seriously, such trivial matters should not be making front page news at all.

SHE'S BACK !

Martina Hingis may have lost in the finals of the Canadian Open to Ana Ivanovic but it is clear that the Swiss Miss is back and back with a bang. After reaching the semifinals she has returned to the Top 10 for the first time since 2002 at a lofty height where compatriots like Serena and Venus Williams, her ineffectiveness against whose power game allegedly forced her out, nowhere close in contention. Way to go. Such are the ups and downs of sport.

Here the Swiss Miss says

"At the beginning of the year if you had asked me if I'd make the Top 10, I'd kiss your hand and say, 'Well, yes, of course I'll take it.' But now I'm making it and I see those girls really fight to earn their spot; you always want more. Of course, I'm frustrated losing the finals, but all you can do is keep your head up; there's certainly some things I have to work on before the US Open."

What are the odds on a Federer-Hingis double blast at a Grand Slam tournament in the near future ?

Happy Independence Day

dnaWishing all my friends a happy and patriotic Independence Day.

On this day, here are a couple of stories that caught the eye.

Here, 2 Pakistani terrorists are nabbed.

And here, the story of a Pakistani Indian 21-year old girl.

Both quite unrelated yet very relevant today.

Meanwhile on this occasion, once again I begin to wonder ...

Corporate

Verdict: Brilliant.

Madhur Bhandarkar has done it again after Page 3. In my opinion two things are vital to sustain a film. The first is a coherent storyline and the second the pace and Corporate scores brilliantly on both these counts. Additionally, Bhandarkar also addresses the issues quite beautifully. A case in point is the issue where one of the corporate heads asks the minister to “order” his Swadeshi lobby to get into action to destroy his competitor. And there are many others.

After a spate of mediocre roles in which she merely looked gorgeous Bipasha Basu has finally got the opportunity that can do justice to her potential and the talented Bengali babe pulls it off splendidly. She is undoubtedly the biggest star of this movie and the fact that none of the other actors hog the limelight in such a successfully made venture is further tribute to the director.

The only sore point I felt in this flick is K.K. Menon. I do not say that he has done a bad job at all somehow I just don’t appreciate him – just as I did not in Sarkar.

Finally, in this movie that depicts the murky methods in the Corporate World, you do not feel sorry or sympathetic for any of the characters as the drama unveils and each pays horribly for his misdeeds. Therein lays the success of the movie.

Quite A Statement

"No red bag accompanied me, nor did I have any such bag carried for me on the relief/rescue flight. Indeed, I have never possessed, borrowed or carried any red bag ever,"

This is a statement from former Foreign Minister Jaswant Singh in response to a query as to whether he carried a red bag full of explosives to Kandahar during the hijacking of IC 814.

Note the statement in bold. Now I do not wish to implicate him of anything here but how can one be so sure of all the bags one has ever possessed or carried? Couldn’t it be possible that he had a red backpack when he was a kid or he used one of those red carry-bags or something like that when going shopping with his kids ?

Yeh Hai Mumbai Meri Jaan ...

Read this very interesting story from DNA India. Haven’t we seen this happen over and over again in Bollywood films? And here it is happening in reality. Fascinating to say the least. This is Mumbai where reel and real life merges.

Now after Google Earth

We have this from Wikipedia. Interesting positives: the ability to annotate. Note for eg. Sadashiv Peth in Pune plus the fact that it opens in a browser.
The negative is that it does not zoom in as far as Google Earth.

YIPPPPPPPPIEEEEEEEEEEEE !!

Google Accessible

This is a new tool by Google that tries to rank higher pages that are accessible to the visually impaired. Google has asked web developers to make their site more favorable for these sections of society so as to obtain a higher rank. Fine idea but it seems Google itself is not too customized to these people ironically. Here is a small tool that compares results of Google default and Google Accessible and I searched the keyword “Google” itself. The results tell a story.

I Think Of You ...

I Think Of You
When The Winds Sing Their Song, I Think Of You
When The Clouds Bring Their Scent, I Think Of You
When The Mornings Show Off Their Hues, I Think Of You
When The Evening Shadows Grow Long.

I Think Of You
On A Glorious Sunny Day, When All Life Is Happy And Gay
When The Seasons Change Their Tune, When There’s A Break In The Heat Of June
When The Buds Wear New Colors, When The Trees Are Clothed in Flowers
When The Flowers Come To Life With The Humming Of The Bees
I Think Of You

I Think Of You
On A Beautiful Clear Night, When Dreams Are Set Alight
When The Stars Adorn The Sky, When The Garden Is Lit By The Glowing Fly
When There Arrives A Silence Deep, When Slowly I Collapse Into Light Sleep
When Body And Soul In The Night Find Their Peace
I Think Of You

Oh Yeah, They're Sorry !

The LTTE have expressed regret over the killing of Rajiv Gandhi and have called upon India to start a new chapter in our relationship with the Tigers.

My foot, I say. Murderers do not deserve pardon nor do they have the right to regret IMO. Now when they realize they are helpless and need India's help they have come out with this facade. It would be a good idea to ask them to get lost.

Music In My Life

Music plays a very important role in my life. Yesterday when my friend Mukta wondered whether my blog was turning into a website for old Hindi songs lyrics it made me think. I confirmed to myself what I already knew all along - music has tremendous power.

Music will cry with you when you are down, then inspire you to lift your sagging spirits. It will give you a chance to vent your frustration as well as share your enthusiasm and happiness.

While I cannot share the actual music on my blog, I do jot down lyrics of songs that suit my mood of the moment. Mainly because these are so ingrained in our minds that on reading them the tune is automatically played in our heads.

I was always tremendously passionate about music and am in general a fan of art of any kind. But like others I was of the opinion that artists are in general grossly overrated. That an above average artist (provided he is performing the right kind of art, read Bollywood, Music, Cricket) earns way more by some not too great performances than say a dedicated surgeon or engineer who has put in years of hard work is a common way to put across this point. A point I still agree to partly, but after what I went through in the past month or so and the way I relied on music to get me through those tough times I have changed my views a bit.

While not all art can be a masterpiece, good artistic creations are meant to help the human mind .... in the above mentioned ways ... that is to face fear, sorrow, share joy etc. Good books, memorable music, great movies ... and depending on each person's taste all art forms are treasures that need to be valued.

Ro Ro Ke Inhee Raahon Mein
Khone Pada Ek Apne Ko
Has Has Ke Inhee Raahon Mein
Apnaya Tha Begaane Ko

Jeevan Ke Safar Mein Rahi
Milte Hai Bichchad Jaane Ko
Aur De Jaate Hain Yaadein
Tanhayee Mein Tadpaane Ko

Tum Apnee Nayee Duniya Mein
Kho Jao Paraaye Bankar
Jee Paaye To Hum Jee Lenge
Marne Ki Saza Paane Ko

Jeevan Ke Safar Mein Rahi
Milte Hai Bichchad Jaane Ko
Aur De Jaate Hain Yaadein
Tanhayee Mein Tadpaane Ko

Mere Toote Dil Mein Koi Khwahish Na Rahi
Armaanon Ke Sab Raaste Soone Pade
Kyon Dua Bhi Meri Bani Aaj Bad-dua ?
Yeh Ehsaas Chahat Ke Sabhi Chubhne Lage

Kisse Kuchch Puraane Mil Gaye ... Rone Ke Bahaane Mil Gaye ...

Tujhe Bhoolna Bhi Chahoon To Na Bhula Sakoo
Tu Hi Bata Tere Bina Kaise Rahoon
Tu Jaane Na Sanam Gham Maine Kya Saha
Bikhre Mere Sapne Zameen Pe Tootke

Kisse Kuchch Puraane Mil gaye ... Rone Ke Bahaane Mil Gaye ...

Yaad Hai Woh Pehli Mulaqaat Yaad Hain
Yaad Hai Mujhe Woh Teri Har Ek Baat Yaad Hain
Woh Maheki Raatein Saari Saugaatein
Bheegi Meri Aankhon Se Aansoo Beh Chale


Kisse Kuchch Puraane Mil gaye ... Rone Ke Bahaane Mil Gaye ...

It is an era of plagiarism and IMO equally bad remixes. So I thought how bad can it be to actually extend someone else's work after of course giving full credit for the original ? So here goes.

Dil To Paagal Hain
*First 2 verses are from the original song, next 2 are mine

Pehli pehli baar milata hain yahi
Seene Mein Phir aag lagata hain
Dheere dheere pyaar sikhata hain yahi
Hasata hain yahi yahi rulata hain

Dil to paagal hain dil deewana hai

Saari saari raat jagaata hain yahi
Akkhiyon se neend churata hain
Sachche jhoote khwab dikhata hain yahi
Hasata hain yahi yahi rulata hain

Dil to paagal hain dil deewana hain

Din mahinen sal satata hain yahi
Bedardi se yeh tadpaata hain
Der se hamein ek baar samjhata hain yahi
Hasata hain yahi yahi rulata hain

Dil to paagal hain dil deewana hain

Sadiyon ke baad lautata hain yahi
Bhoole armaano ko jagata hain
Phir pal mein fanaa kar deta hain yahi
Mitata hain yahi khud mit bhi jata hain

Dil to paagal hain dil deewana hain

Where Art Thou Oh Friend ?

I need you right now. Not for help, I shall perhaps need the help later. But right now I need you to just be there for me. Just know what I am going through. I know I might not have kept in touch. But I need you now like never before. Please, wherever you are ... please come over ... please ...

Musical Relief

This is probably one of the toughest life situations I am going through and while I do not know what is going to happen or how I am going to come out of it if at all I am, but in the short term I have an exam coming up the day after and I need to start studying for that. Clearly I am in no frame of mind to give an exam but I have to suck it up and bull-headedly go after it. Luckily, I am not alone. I have my music with me. Thank you Raaga.com and Musicindiaonline.com. Music is simply great. It is hard to find any equivalent concept in this World that can be your best companion - above even your best friends, loved ones and good books. There may come a time when all of these might seem inadequate like they are doing now but I am banking on music to carry me through. So let us make a start now and tonight a night-out of studies it is going to be in the company of music. Veer Zaara it is to start things off.

Often on this blog I have posted lines from songs that I feel are suited to my mood of the moment. Often these are a bit of an exaggeration, mostly part of them fit while others don't. This particular one I'm writing however matches verbatim my state of mind, a beautiful Hemant Kumar number.

Rulakar Chal Diye; Ek Din
Hansi Bankar Jo Aaye The
Chaman Ro Ro Ke Kehta Hain
Kabhi Gul Muskuraye The

Agar Dil Ke Jubaan Hoti
Yeh Gham Kuchch Kam To Ho Jaata
Idhar Woh Chup Udhar Seene
Mein Hum Toofan Chhupaaye The

Yeh Achcha Tha Na Hum Kehte
Kisise Dastaan Apni
Samajh Paaye Na Jab Apne
Paraaye To Paraaye The

The (Anti) Butterfly Effect In Its Full Horror

I have tended to believe in the butterfly effect in every form. Sure the mathematical meaning is quite different but I also tend to appreciate and would like to believe its populist version: That a butterfly flapping its wings in China can affect the wheat production in Indonesia and cause thunderstorms in other parts of the World etc.

In fact I would like to take a step further and ask what if the corollary is also true ? Can it be possible that a butterfly that was supposed to flap its wings in China to keep the World order going failed to do so and that led to a horrible disaster like the tsunami in Indonesia ?? Quite plausible ain't it ?

Tangentially does the butterfly effect apply in time as it does in space ? Can the flapping of a wings (or lack of it) by a butterfly in Indonesia today affect the occurence or non-occurence of a tsunami some 2000 years in the future ?

Don't they say that words that once leave your mouth, you cannot control and can come back to haunt you in the future ?? Don't they say "Speech is silver, silence is golden." ?? All very fine but IMO paints a very one sided picture. What they fail to tell you is that what you did not say some time in the past may come back to horribly haunt you in the future and mess up the rest of your life. I have today been firmly convinced by what someone said at my graduation ceremony last year - "You will always regret more what you did not do than what you did".

Butterflies all over the World, flap your wings, at least that way no matter what the consequences you will not be left with the regret of what if.

Bhoola Afsana Koi
Gujra Zamaana Koi
Saathi Purana Koi
Banke Bahaana Koi
Agar Dil Mein Woh
Sama Jaaaye Toh
Yeh Dil Kya Kare?

Us Paar Reh Na Sake
Is Paar Aa Naa Sake
Kehna Tha Keh Na Sake
Chup Bhi To Reh Na Sake
Main Bechain Hoon
Tu Betaab Hain
Yeh Dil Kya Kare?

A situation has occurred in life that makes me want to reminisce on these beautiful lyrics from a favorite song of mine.

Anjaane Hoton Par Kyon Pehchane Geet Hain ?
Kal Tak Jo Begaane The, Janmon Ke Meet Hain.
O Mitwa Re, Kal Tak Jo Begaane The Janmon Ke Meet Hain
Kya Hoga Kaun Se Pal Mein, Koi Jaane Na.

Isn't it amazing when you suddenly begin to feel someone's emotions be they pain or joy because you have been through a very similar experience ? You really do begin to see the World in a different light, from the eyes of that person, and you appreciate him/her like never before.

Trouble

I am being troubled these days. I know what it is about. I can’t do anything about it. I want to do something about it. I want to get over it. Move past it and lead a life unfettered by it. Accomplish something wonderful and then laugh down on this thing that is troubling me, mocking it, like it is mocking me right now, telling it “Look you tried your best to pull me down and you failed and I succeeded.”

But right now it is the trouble that is having the upper hand. How long will this situation last? When will I be able to turn things around?

Writer's Block ?

I can’t think of what to write. Every time I try to write something I feel like taking the easier option of surfing the net. Really what kind of a necessary evil this World of laptops and wireless connections is.

The Strange Case Of Conchita Martinez

An ideal example of how you do not really like someone initially (well, who am I kidding might as well say I hated her) then you get to know that they are not that bad and finally when they leave you feel so attached that you actually feel a tinge of sadness !

What Does Amit Have To Say About This ?

Just came across this article on FOX via a link on The Corridor of Uncertainty.

Basically, my point of interest lies in this paragraph:

And you do not need to own a satellite dish to watch it, as, by government decree, any successful bidder for the TV rights to Indian cricket must allow Doordarshan, the state channel, a feed.

This requirement has been imposed on Nimbus, the production group that recently paid $867 million for a four-year deal with the Indian Cricket Board, and it has served Indian cricket well because it is playing its part in spreading the sports gospel to areas where, thanks to the growth of vibrant cities and improved transport, aspiring cricketers can be put in touch with good facilities and coaches.

So what we have hear is a clear case of restriction on the concept of free markets one which is very dear to Amit and Gaurav, both of whose blogs I am a keen reader of and whose views I respect immensely. Yet, as this article mentions and I think I agree it has been of great benefit to young Indian cricketers in rural areas and Indian cricket in general. About the only persons suffering from it are the guys at Nimbus.

Just to cite some examples of the benefits - the names Pathan, Dhoni, RP Singh, Munaf etc quickly come to mind. Plus the fact that Uttar Pradesh has won the Ranji Trophy for the first time !

So was wondering whether Amit and Gaurav will concede that this is an aberration to their staunch belief in the fact that free markets end up benefiting all or do they not consider this to be beneficial in the long term ??

Me, as I candidly admit am yet to make up my mind on this free market issue. This is just another interesting manifestation of my dilemma that I am pondering over.

Freedom Of Speech In Gujarat !

This is what happens in one of the most prosperous states of the World's largest democracy.

Link via Amit Varma.

Update: All is not dark of course, here is a site that lists the good that is happening in India. Check it out for yourself. I haven't explored it in full detail yet, but seems interesting.

Shocking

Read this post on Amit Varma's India Uncut.

I absolutely agree with him. There are so many things we as a nation have got to learn.

It is only through reading the blogs of such people having knowledge of economics that we can realize how much there is still to be done and that an 8.1 annual increase in GDP is only 1 part of the story.

Watching Live Cricket In Class

This is an amazing experience, folks. I am actually watching live coverage of the India v Pakistan game while in class !

Several factors have combined to make this possible.
1. Luckily the cricket is available on my unreliable link today.
2. I have just discovered that paying attention in this class does not pay anyway.
3. I am particularly pissed off at this particular teacher because she did not accept my last homework even though it was submitted on time simply because she was not in office during her office hours.
4. Usage of laptop in class is liberally allowed here.
5. There is excellent wireless signal strength.

So all in all it feels very brilliant and very powerful.

I am taken back to those good old school days when we used to stealthily listen to the radio commentary in class. Now it is video and it is open. Just brilliant.

A Question Of Classification

Should I consider playing outdoor sports as part of my physical exercise routine ??

As most of you will readily agree in graduate student life there is precious little time for anything other than academics. So this time needs to be devoted with great care to all other activities.

The overlap between sports and exercise makes this particular choice rather difficult. For sports can give you exercise but in a rather more unpredictable manner than the gym. But when the weather is great it does seem a shame to be cooped up inside in a gym.

Of course I, like many other people primarily play sport for the love of it than for the physical exercise. Hmm ... an interesting choice this. One which will take some thought.

A Victory For Free Choice

This.

An Experience

Had been to John Nash's lecture today. More to follow ...

I Hate You !

That might sound like a horrible thing to say - but I was just wondering - is hatred better than indifference ? I remember making a post a few days back about my desire to hurt someone and the more I think of it I realize that if I want to hurt that person it is because it MATTERS to me whether he/she is hurt. So clearly I am not indifferent towards him/her.

I remember reading a poem in Hindi in Standard 10. It went something like:

Agar Phool Nahin Bo Sakte To
Kaatein Kam Se Kam Mat Bovo

Meaning if you can't make a person happy at least don't hurt him/her.

Now I can't say I totally disagree with that - but I do feel hatred is perhaps a better emotion to have than indifference. I don't know whether I would feel better to be hated than to be not cared for.

I Disagree

As I am reading one "Manacha Shlok" everyday I begin to realize that I disagree with several rather most of what it has to say. With the notable exception of the insistence on truth, of course. I do not understand whether I am being a fool to disagree with an acknowledged great soul like Shri Ramdas Swami or whether I am just not being able to understand the deeper meaning. Of course in due time I will try to come up with specific points about where and why I disagree. But for now I am just wondering whether I am right to dispute what he says.

Hurt

Right now I really feel like hurting one person. And hurt him/her real bad. Because he/she has hurt me. But I don't know whether I should. I have started reading Manache Shlok every day and they teach me not to hurt. However somewhere at the back of my mind I have this intense desire to hurt.

I don't know whether what I am doing or going to do is right or wrong. Hell I don't even know if that person will be hurt or not ... hmmm.

Ram - Maryada Purushottam ? Or Just Human ?

Very interesting - Read here.

Thanks Kanishka for the link.

Suddenly remembered this brilliant Kishore Kumar song and thought I might as well blog it down.

Jin Raaton Ki Bhor Nahin Hain, Aaj Aisi Hi Raat Aayi
Bojh Se Gham Ke Doob Gaya Dil, Saagar Ki Hain Gehrayee

Raat Ke Taaron Tum Hi Bata Do, Meri Woh Manzil Hain Kahan
Paagal Bankar Jiske Liye Main Kho Baitha Hoon Dono Jahan

Raah Kisi Ki Hui Na Roshan Jalna Mera Beqar Gaya
Loot Gayee Taqdeer Mujhe, Main Jeetke Baazi Haar Gaya